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Monkey-Plex
We're going to the movies ... at the Monkey-Plex! Carrying over at least one theme from the last page, here's a look at current and past movie releases, rated on a scale of one to five monkeys. Five monkeys, of course, is best!
FILM: Finding Nemo
3 monkeys
My best friends, parents of fast-growing seven and four-year-old girls, thought parts of this film were too intense for young kids. As did the four-year-old, it turns out. But the seven-year-old, who previously had been traumatized by Pixar’s quite scary “Hopper” from A Bug’s Life, made it through this film with no problems. As always, your children, like your mileage, may vary.

So was the film any good?

Now that, to me, is a much more interesting question. There certainly is a lot that “works” here, from supporting characters to locations, and the overall look of the film is awesome. There is an awful lot of jeopardy, though, and eventually I was a bit wrung out by Nemo’s (and Marlin’s) trials and tribulations.

I think the film may have suffered from having too many characters. There are enough good characters here for two or three movies (all movies should have this problem!), but I think we could have lost a few and not suffered at all.

In the end, I was won over by both the incredible visuals, and some sneaky clever writing. It seemed like some of the best lines in the film were barely audible in my theatre, due to people laughing at prior jokes. Other times, it seemed like I was the only one who cracked up at certain bits and gags, so there certainly is plenty in there for the more adult, more discerning animation fan.

Oh, and good work, Ellen!

A final note: As always with Pixar films, it should be noted that those who leave early (that is, before the end of the credits) will not be getting the full value for their entertainment dollar.

FILM: Hollywood Homicide
2 monkeys
Feh.

Somewhere in here is a clever and fresh take on the buddy cop comedy, but sadly, it’s not trying that hard to get out. This film is stuck in the “not funny enough to be a comedy, not action-filled enough to be an action flick” black hole. Harrison Ford has some nice moments, but I continue to be amazed at the career “success” of droopy-eyed, low energy Josh Hartnett.

I can’t recommend seeing this film in the theater, or even renting it; if it’s eventually on HBO or Showtime, and you have absolutely nothing better to do, then check it out. Or, if you’re trying to see all movies featuring action scenes in the L.A. subway system, well then, definitely check this out. (Metro Red Line fans will also want to check out The Italian Job and S.W.A.T. to complete the Summer Subway Trifecta.)

FILM: Winged Migration
4.5 monkeys
Now here is a movie worth seeking out! If you’ve ever dreamed of flying, or of soaring with birds high in the sky, run, don’t walk, to the nearest theater showing this film. The spectacular images pile up, one after another, amazing vistas followed by jaw-dropping flocks moving in precise formations on multi-thousand mile journeys. And you are there every flap of the way. You get to fly wingman, in the formation and just inches away from the other birds, with a flock flying to survive. Incredible.

I realize the practicality of capturing these images precluded filming this movie in the IMAX format, but that’s perhaps the best way to describe this film – the greatest non-IMAX IMAX film ever. Can’t wait for the DVD to see how it was done.

FILM: The Matrix Reloaded
2.5 monkeys
Uh … what? I guess I really should have gone back and re-watched The Matrix first. I didn’t, though, figuring my basic knowledge and understanding of the original Matrix story would help me through any confusing parts of this one.

As Keanu would say … whoa.

In The Matrix, I loved that we traveled along with Neo as he slowly came to discover that his entire world was a lie.

With that lie exposed (Or is it? More later…), The Matrix Reloaded was, to my way of thinking, a lot less imaginative. I mean, sure, the effects were spectacular, but there was never a moment that I thought anything other than, “hey, that’s a cool effect.” And that’s not the way it’s supposed to be.

The joy of discovery, of finding a new world that’s not like our own, is complete absent here. That joy void is filled with darkness and despair. I certainly don’t require this from all of my movies, but this is again (like Star Wars Episode II: Attack of the Clones) a movie in which nobody is having any fun at all – and that included me. I didn’t enjoy my visit to the Matrix this time, and I really don’t care what happens in the third chapter.

More about the exposed lie: In the Matrix, Neo has super-powers of a sort. In fact, he has the same sort of powers he exhibits at the end of the film in a place that is very definitely not supposed to be inside the Matrix. Or is it? Hmm … guess I may have to check out The Matrix: Revolutions after all. Curse you, Wachowski Brothers!

FILM: X2: X-Men United
2.5 monkeys
There’s nothing wrong here, just good solid super-hero action. So why wasn’t I more thrilled with this film? I liked an awful lot of it … even if it did at some times seem to teeter precipitously on the edge of “preachy” (which is never fun in a summer blockbuster). A bit long, but that can be forgiven. The super-heroic action is all very well executed and true to its “reality,” which is something you don’t always get in these type of movies.

All in all, I have no major complaints, but if you’re thinking that doesn’t exactly sound like a ringing endorsement, you’re thinking right along with me.

FILM: Spellbound
3.5 monkeys
You know, there’s just something about ESPN’s telecast of the National Spelling Bee finals that makes my skin crawl. Perhaps it’s all that stalling the contestants use when they obviously have no idea how to spell “opsimath”; “Can I have the language of origin? Can you use it in a sentence? Can you spell the world for me?” etc., etc. Look, kid, either you know it, or you don’t. And for that matter, look, Spelling Bee people, either give the kids all that information about the world up front, or don’t. But don’t drag out the spelling of one word so it goes on longer than the final "time-out" frenzy during the last 45 seconds of low-scoring 74-73 NBA game.

That said, Spellbound is pretty damn cool. Dispensing with the faux Bee theatrics I loathe, this documentary focuses in on the kids (and families) who choose to spell for fun. The advent of spell-check has made spelling a skill that many kids today seem to regard as not at all necessary. Still, this film delights in and celebrates the academic and lexicographic achievement of eight teens who have veered from the traditional teen path of boy band and Hilary Duff worship.

More interesting than the contestants, though, are the families; a fascinating cross-section of America is represented here, from immigrant success stories to isolationist Southern stereotypes. You’ll have to look hard to find this film, but it’s worth it, I promise.

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